Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Growth Group Reflections

I'm 4 weeks into leading our first Growth Group and here are a few reflections so far. . .

  • It's challenging. I'm a pastor. What I do is talk to people and work with people. But I'm surprised how much leading a Growth Group has stretched me. It gives me great empathy for our 30 other Growth Group leaders, their commitment and vulnerability in leading. We do lots of spiritual things with each other and next to each other, but to turn toward each other and process spiritual things and our faith together . . . that's really a stretch for most of us. It's challenging for everyone to get there. It's challenging to manage the time--it goes so fast. It's challenging to host and lead.
  • It's a commitment. Just setting aside the time each week is a commitment. One more thing in our already busy lives. Hosting is a commitment. It's impossible not to clean-up a little bit. Having 25+ people in your home each week necessitates some clean up afterward. I've been making soup each week. Others have been bringing side-dishes each week. This, too, is a commitment. We have to plan for this. We have to plan around this.

  • It's intimate. It's vulnerable for anyone and everyone to open up your life, struggles, faith and doubts to other people. To ask for prayer and be prayed for. This involves ongoing risk taking.

  • It takes time. Our group is connecting much more naturally in week 4 than we did in week 1. There is definitely a life-cycle to these groups. Week 1 was frustrating and felt forced. But already by week 4, I feel like we know what's happening in one another's lives and are jumping right in with one another.

  • It requires God working. If our group or any group is going to go, God must show up. God must work in our regular gathering. He's got to enable us to take risks and open up to one another. He's got to help us keep the commitment. He's got to lead and guide and illumine the word. He's got to help and give wisdom and discernment and spiritual freshness to Growth Group leaders. Because of the aforementioned factors, He's got to make it happen. I realize I can't make this group go or these people grow apart from Him. I have prayed hard for our group. I've prayed harder and more consistently than ever for our 30 Growth Groups and their leaders.

  • It's a rhythm. It's so easy to think of our lives as shaped by events and purchases. I think rhythms and practices shape us. Rhythms and practices are more subtle and go deeper and take longer. I see our weekly Growth Group as a life-shaping practice. It's not about any one week, but about connecting and practicing gathering with God's people.

  • It's so worth it. Though it's a lot of work and challenging, I look forward to our group each week. It's been so sweet sharing a meal together weekly and having kids present with us. It feels like these families are, in a small way, living life together. I expect this feeling will only grow. I'm more convinced than ever, that this is what life is about and this is how God intends for us to live. Our Growth Group is a lab where we're working in and working out and applying the Gospel.

Leading a Growth Group is one of a couple of things that has kept me away from blogging recently. That's a good thing. Less electronic and more real life.

I'd love to hear some thoughts from others of you who are in Growth Groups here at Grace this Spring. Share your experience. Share some encouragement or even a challenge. . . .

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Adopt-A-People Update

As we've shared, we are slowly, but steadily moving toward focusing our missions outreach toward the adoption of an unreached people group (UPG).

An unreached people group is a people group united by a common language and culture where there is not yet a self-sustaining multiplying church.

Following our fun map project, where we gathered lots of congregational input, we sense the Lord is focusing our selection process toward Indonesia or India. In other areas, there are a plethora of unreached peoples.


Our terrific Adopt-A-People Team recently shared the following guidelines/preferences they are using to help focus our search for the appropriate UPG for Grace:

  • We want hands on involvement with the people we adopt.
  • We desire a long-term missionary placement (though not necessarily from Grace).
  • We want to be able to send short-term teams.
  • We prefer a UPG where we already have connections.
  • We favor partnerships with other churches, agencies, etc.
  • Prefer a people easily accessible by air travel
  • The larger the people group, the better.
  • Sensitive to the security of the country we will work in - prefer a "safe" environment.
  • Sensitive to the religious culture of the people - prefer those peoples least likely to find the "Christian God".

I think these are excellent guidelines.

Our APG Team Leader, Tim Arlen, is right now in India with a team from Atascadero Bible Church exploring partnering opportunities with Empart. I very much wanted to go on this trip, as well, but I just couldn't pull it off.

The need is enormous in India and Tim has been sending back some incredible and heart-wrenching reports, like this one. . .

Dear Partners in the Gospel,

Believe it or not, this is the first chance I've had to e-mail. We've had long days from early morning to late at night. I do not have a laptop with me, so I must depend on the internet room at our hotel. Not very accessible or convenient. Additionally, they have asked me to preach/teach a few times, which has consumed any free time I might otherwise have had. (I did not come prepared for that, but..."be instant in season and out of season"!) All that to say I'm sorry it has taken me this long to get a message out, but I see that Tammy has forwarded you some of Tom Ferrell's e-mails. He has given you a pretty good picture of the time we have spent here thus far.

It is now early Sunday evening and we leave for Agra soon to bring some encouragement to a snake charmer caste. I'm not sure exactly what we will be doing with them, but I'm told it will be some form of a caste reconciliation program. We are getting ready to travel overnight on the train which they say is a must experience! Can't wait to fill you all in!

In the next few days I hope to spend some one-on-one time with Jossy Chacko, the head of the Empart movement. I have many questions for him in light of what I've experienced here and thinking about our potential partnership with him. Please pray that we will be able to communicate clearly and honestly with each other so that I can have accurate and complete information to evaluate prayerfully with all of you. This trip has been a different sort of experience for me as I've tried to process everything as a representative of Grace Church rather than only as Tim Arlen. Please continue to pray for me that I may be able to have the wisdom of God in understanding the "heart" of this ministry and in forming some preliminary conclusions about having a long-term relationship with them.

I hope to have the opportunity to e-mail again, but I cannot guarantee anything. My time is not my own. I will definitely look forward to giving a complete report of my observations and experiences here after I return home. In the meantime I so appreciate your prayers. I have given your greetings to all the brothers and sisters here every chance I've had. And they are greatly encouraged by the fact that a church on the central coast of California is praying for them and considering a partnership with them in the advance of the gospel throughout North India. Let us pray that God will continue to empower these believers to reach their goal of 100,00 churches by 2020!

Your Servant in Christ,

Tim Arlen

Let's pray that the Gospel will run in India and that the Lord will direct our steps! Let's uphold Tim and his team in prayer.

Monday, April 05, 2010

Monday post-Easter

I'm tuckered out from a day of preaching and family fun yesterday. Easter Services were full and rich. It was a blessing to plumb the depths of Hebrews 7:25, sort of an irregular Easter text.(listen here!)

This evening is our first Growth Group. I can tell the whole family is excited. It was fun to hear our 13 and 11 year old girls strategically planning for how to keep the little ones occupied. Chili is in the pot. Cornbread will go in at 5:00. Everyone should be here by 6:00.

I'm in a unique position as not just the facilitator of the discussion, but also the creator of the content. I'm not sure how this will go, but I really don't want to be the pastor. We'll see how it goes. . . . I'll let you know.

Since is Easter vacation for many, Growth Groups are sort of "soft starting" this week. If you missed all the sign-ups, but want to get into a group this quarter, email Pastor Steve.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Good for Piper

John Piper is taking a leave of absence from preaching, pastoring and virtually all public commitments for the rest of 2010 to focus his energy and attention on his wife and family.

Here's the blog post.

I think this is a great, bold move. I can't imagine the pressure Piper lives under and the toll it takes on his family. With all his commitments and callings, I'm sure he's missed much of his family life. There is only so much of each us to go around.

I love his vulnerability and modeling here.

The pressures of pulpit ministry are unique. Not worse than any one elses' pressures, but unique. You create this amazing ministry or you let it be created around you. The Lord is pleased to bless your ministry. But then its really, really hard to be fully engaged and present on the home front.

Nothing, but the Lord, is more important than our marriages and families. Piper recognizes this and is about to demonstrate it to his wife, Noel. I'm challenged by that.

Challenges me today to evaluate my priorities.

Lets pray for the Pipers.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

reflections, 03.25.10

  • It was encouraging to see so many new folks at our Spring Welcome Lunch last Sunday. Linking the Welcome Lunch to our Getting to Know Grace class has been a good move that creates a clear path into our church. GraceSLO is a dynamic place. We lose some to graduation, relocation, and dissatisfaction, but we also keep gaining some. I'm encouraged by the many of who are finding Grace and making it their home.
  • We're excited about our Spring Growth Group. With 12 adults and 15 kids, its going to be interesting. We'll see how it goes. Potluck, family style. Looking forward to gathering regularly to explore and apply God's Word, pray and care for one another. Hope you're still prayerfully evaluating the rocks (priorities) of your life and considering how to wedge the big rock of Growth Groups in. It was definitely a long, challenging process for our family. I expect it will be for other families as well. Still time to sign up for the Spring.
  • Thursday Men's Study (need a name, any suggestions?) wrapped up Piper's "The Pleasures of God" this morning. Its been a humbling and thought-provoking study. Next week we'll start "Why We Love the Church." Its a great time to jump in, if you're looking to connect and grow. 6:00 to 7:00 AM, in and out. Its about the rhythm of being together and keeping the Lord and His word in the center of our lives. Email me, if you want to jump in.
  • Can't believe Easter is here already. Invite someone or lots of people to attend our services at 8, 9:30 and 11:00. Note the change-up in the service times. Easter is one Sunday when people are more open to attending church. Let's take full advantage of that.
  • Serve Day 2010 is happening May 15. This year Pastor Steve is spearheading a multi-church, county wide effort. Its going to a great. We all want to serve and make a difference in the community. Here's an identifiable way. Let's serve the Lord and others in word and deed.
  • Our search for a new Student Ministries pastor is still happening behind the scenes. Things are progressing slowly. Be in prayer for this important process.
  • Our family is bracing ourselves for the reality of three kids in three sports this Spring. Not sure how we're going to pull it off, but we're going to try. Haaken is doing Kid's Love Soccer, Sage will play Futsal (indoor soccer) and Zeke is playing Rookie Baseball. I'm guessing we're not the only ones. Its a challenge to balance 4 while doing what we can to provide stimulating whole life growth opportunities. I'll let you know how it goes.
  • We have a small 3 bedroom house (1200 square feet) on our property that we are looking to rent to a nice couple or small family. They will living in close proximity to our madness, but it's a great place in a beautiful rural setting in East Arroyo Grande. Our prayer is that the Lord will provide someone we know or someone who knows someone we know. Should be available by May 1 or before. Email me if you are interested or you know anyone.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

fences & moats

As we continue to see a continual stream of marriages on the brink of blow up or melt down, its reminded me again of the importance of marital fences and moats. Given how committed Susie and I are to these practices, I'm surprised how few couples have them. Here's what I tell couples about my and Susie's own commitment to one another. . .

  • We are committed to avoiding solo one-on-one meetings with others of the opposite sex. This means no outside lunches. This means my assistant or any of our female staff and I are not alone in the office building together. This means counseling happens on campus behind a door with a glass panel in it. This means I don't even take female babysitters home. This is real inconvenient at times.

  • We are committed to total and open transparency in our schedules. We work off a shared calendar. We give one another the right to ask about our various appointments. This keeps us connected throughout the day. We know where one another is at and what we're doing.

  • We are committed to total and open transparency in all things electronic. Facebook and other social networking sites offer way too much opportunity for the development of inappropriate relationships. Susie and I have ongoing access to all of the other's email accounts, passwords and web histories. We believe that our trust depends on that type of transparency, not on the fostering and fighting for privacy.

  • We are committed to letting one another determine the boundaries of our virtual and real lives. This means we give one another the freedom to veto practices, behaviors, time/schedule commitments.

  • We are committed to sitting down at least weekly to talk about our lives, our commitments, our schedules and our children. When necessary we schedule the time. The more consistent we can be, the more fruitful and effective. Our lives our so busy that we need to do this in order to survive and thrive.

I think marriage in today's world requires this kind of vigilance and transparency. We believe this is what "oneness" is all about. There is so much undermining marriage in today's world. The enemy wants to destroy marriages. We need to fight for our marriages. These measures and more are part of the fight.

And beneath all these things, the key to a vibrant, intimate, committed marriage is a lifestyle of brokenness toward one another and before the Lord. The ability to humbly come to one another and admit that we've blown it, confess our sins and shortcomings and ask for forgiveness and commit to growth.

Do you have fences and moats around your marriage? If not, build some, dig some.

Are you broken before your spouse and the Lord in your marriage? If not, humble yourself and ask the Lord to take you there.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Wise Words from Packer

Stumbled across these thought-provoking gems from J.I. Packer . . .

To pastors. . .

You have three priorities: teach, teach, teach. Evangelical churches are weaker than we realize because we don't teach the confessions and doctrine. Set new standards in teaching. Understand the word catechesis and practice that art.


To web devotees. . .

I'm amazed at the amount of time people spend on the internet. I'm not against technology, but all tools should be used to their best advantage. We should be spending our time on things that have staying power, instead of on the latest thought of the latest blogger--and then moving on quickly to the next blogger. That makes us more superficial, not more thoughtful.

Monday, March 15, 2010

I need to laugh more

On this Monday after Sunday, I'm sitting here reading Why We Love the Church by Kevin DeYoung and Ted Kluck and I'm literally laughing out loud. . . . all by myself. Kluck, the non-pastor lay guy, especially, cracks me up with his brutal honesty and touch of sarcasm. . .

Just had to share. . . . .

In his book, "Wide Open Spaces, author Jim Palmer explains that he has left the church in favor of a Wednesday night meeting with a friend at Starbucks. He talks of spiritual discussions on a boat with a best friend. He says of these meetings, "If one of us starts into those religious modes of thinking, or drones on in God-talk that has little correlation to our daily reality, we quickly rein things back in.

And later, "There's no person or set of persons you can point to as the ones in charge of or responsible for what happens. All of us believe that we have an equal 'calling' to know God and make him known amid ordinary life and people. Everyone is a leader and a follower, everyone is a teacher and student."

Palmer's construct of "neo-church" certainly sounds exciting, what with regular trips to Starbucks, Panera, and excursions out on his friend's boat. But being involved in these sorts of organic house churches--or for that matter even real church--for any period of time, will reveal that not everyone is a "leader" or "teacher."

Never am I more of a fan of the traditional pastor/flock relationship at our church than when the church has what they call an "unstructured service." The unstructured service is a holdover from the church's freewheeling 1970s days and involves, as you might expect, an open mic where congregants share a story, pray, or suggest a song. On paper this seems like a great idea. What kind of coldhearted meanie wouldn't be a fan of people sharing encouragement of prayer requests from their heart?

During unstructured services I usually sit and stare at my bulletin, which I've folded into a tiny pile about the size of a square inch. This is nervous energy. Nervous because of the reality that many people weren't gifted with the ability to stand in front of a group and say something that is God-centered, relevant, and brief. Out of the three, I would take brief. Maybe you've been to services like this. You often hear the sweet older lady who talks for no less than seventeen minutes about her kidney ailment. There is the well-meaning, attractive guy who shares about how all the girls in our church's college group want to get physical with him, and how difficult this is. And, if you're lucky, you might get a bad poem, because, lets' face it, almost all poems are bad. I'm left with the idea that if this is what revolutionary house church would look like on a week-to-week basis, then I'm definitely out.

To be fair, there are always good things that come out of the unstructured service, but I'm usually left feeling really thankful for our pastor and his forty-five minute expositional sermons. Though its much sexier to appear to have come up with something off the top of one's head, I'm glad he spends twenty hours each week reading, praying, and preparing linear sermons.


As a guy who prepares his own 45 minute linear sermons and feels his own nervous energy during unstructured services, this definitely struck my funny bone.

Read the book. Easy read. In the church library.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

on the end of the American empire

Paul Farrell writes for marketwatch.com, a Wall Street Journal financial website. It just so happens that he lives in Arroyo Grande. His articles are always a contrarian, alarmist and terribly thought provoking. His latest is titled "Collapse of the American Empire: Swift, Silent and Certain." The title says it all, but I encourage to read his argument, nonetheless.

I read it and freaked a bit, like I usually do when I read Mr. Farrell. But then I thought about history and God's Word.

Mr. Farrell and those he references are right. . . .the American empire will fall and collapse. All empires before this one have. We are naive if we think that the United States is immune or exempt and so many of the preceding factors are already in place. The question is not "if", but "when".

In the Bible we see the rise and fall of the Israeli, the Babylonian, the Assyrian, the Greek and then the Roman Empires. Our empire is relatively young, when compared to some of these others.

If the collapse is certain and soon, where does that leave us? What should this reality do to us?

Panic is one option.

Paralysis is another.

Pessimism is another.

But I don't think any of these are real and viable options for believers, those who trust in Jesus Christ. This reality ought to drive us back to the Word and back to the Lord.

The Bible tells us . . .

1. Earthly kingdoms and empires rise and fall, but God's kingdom rules over all and endures forever.

For His dominion is an everlasting dominion, And His kingdom endures from generation to generation. All the inhabitants of the earth are accounted as nothing, But He does according to His will in the host of heaven And among the inhabitants of earth; And no one can ward off His hand Or say to Him, ‘What have You done?’ (Daniel 4:34-45)

2. God has a plan and purpose that transcends the rise and fall of kingdoms and uses the rise and fall of kingdoms.

Remember the former things long past, For I am God, and there is no other; [I am] God, and there is no one like Me, Declaring the end from the beginning, And from ancient times things which have not been done, Saying, ‘My purpose will be established, And I will accomplish all My good pleasure’; Calling a bird of prey from the east, The man of My purpose from a far country. Truly I have spoken; truly I will bring it to pass. I have planned [it, surely] I will do it. (Isaiah 46:9-11)

3. Our true citizenship is in heaven. We are sojourners here.

For our citizenship is in heaven, from which also we eagerly wait for a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ; who will transform the body of our humble state into conformity with the body of His glory, by the exertion of the power that He has even to subject all things to Himself. Therefore, my beloved brethren whom I long to see, my joy and crown, in this way stand firm in the Lord, my beloved. (Philippians 3:20-4:1)

4. We have a sure, living, eternal hope.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His great mercy has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to obtain an inheritance which is imperishable and undefiled and will not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, who are protected by the power of God through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. (I Peter 1:3-5)


Since all these things are true, what shall we do?

1. Don't despair, but hope and rejoice in the Lord.

Therefore, prepare your minds for action, keep sober in spirit, fix your hope completely on the grace to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. (1 Peter 1:13)

2. Don't abandon our community, but serve it all the more, as salt and light, in Jesus' name.

“You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt has become tasteless, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled under foot by men. “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden; nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. “Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven." (Matthew 5:13-16)

Your thoughts in response to Mr. Farrell or in response to my response?

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

three births & five deaths

If you were with us on Sunday, you heard me mention the GraceSLO "hat trick" . . . . three babies born this last Saturday, March 6 . . . Cheyenne Wilkinson, Luke Nelson and Lillian Snyder. What a neat deal!

I and my not-so-little girls had the joy of holding them all Sunday afternoon. Fun to watch all these first-time parents.

Sadly this news was tempered by five friends in our church family who each lost a parent to death over the last week. . . . Cathy Blair, Linda Mathias, Wayne Brown, Wynn Heggli, Ron Hamley.

I'm reminded again that this is mix of pastoral ministry and life in the church. There are, at any given time, those who are grieving and those who are rejoicing . . . those who experiencing trials and those experiencing triumphs. The Lord throws us together so that we might care for and serve one another. I'm privileged and usually overwhelmed to have a front row seat to watch and be a part of it all. This is life together.

Be looking for ways to care and serve these 8 families. . . . and others who are experiencing the range of life experiences.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

still here

Been way to long. Out of the blogging rhythm for sure. Lots of thoughts to share, but I've been having such a hard time finding time to put it all down.

Anyway, let's give it another go.

Here are those couple of books I mentioned in my February 7th message entitled, "The Blessings & Benefits of Covenant Membership."


Why We Love the Church by Kevin DeYoung and Ted Kluck

and



Stop Dating the Church by Joshua Harris


Both are great. If you're still struggling or unsure about our move toward covenant membership, I urge you to read one or both. If you've only got time for one, I'd recommend, "Why We love the Church."

They are also available in the church library, if you'd prefer to borrow instead of buy.

Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Grieving for Haiti

As we send over $17,000 to help meet physical and spiritual needs in Haiti, it seems like a drop in the bucket compared to the overwhelming needs. My daughter recently brought me $50 cash and asked me to send it to Compassion as they also seek to meet needs. This morning I was moved by this World Mag article. Loved the balance. God is sovereign and in control. He is accomplishing things we cannot see or now know. And yet we grieve. We ought to grieve. Let us pour out our hearts like water before the Lord. . . .

An indecent grief

First lamentations, then comfort that strengthens more than soothes | Mindy Belz

Just off a transatlantic flight from covering the 1999 Izmit earthquake in Turkey—which killed over 17,000—I ordered coffee at Starbucks. I was dust-covered, unkempt, exhausted. I had come straight from the quake zone, watching all-night rescue efforts lit by generator-driven spotlights end in grief.

The barista set before me one of those really tall coffee concoctions, and I couldn't pick it up. The cartonboard cup with its creamy white cleanness assaulted my senses. It was an affront to the dust-laden, broken-up, shaken-down cityscape I'd inhabited the past week. Coming out of it—back to where rebar held to concrete, where buildings stood with glass intact, where china and stuffed animals stayed on their shelves and children slept in their own beds—felt like a betrayal. I stood frozen at the Starbucks counter and wept.

We Westerners excel at getting on with it, at binding up wounds and fixing what's broken, or paying others to do it for us. We do less well with pausing to grieve, feeling the pain long enough, letting the pain be pain and do its work.

"Pour out your heart like water before the presence of the Lord! Lift your hands to Him for the lives of your children, who faint for hunger at the head of every street," lamented Jeremiah (Lamentations 2:19).

The list of Haiti's needs, while brutally long, can be named and numbered. So can and should its lamentations. A death toll from an island the size of Massachusetts to rival a tsunami that spanned an ocean and 14 nations. Ten thousand quake victims per day dumped without name or record into mass graves. Thousands beneath the rubble awaiting a rescue that did not come. Each is an individual sorrow and together an unfathomable calamity.

"Oh that my head were waters, and my eyes a fountain of tears, that I might weep day and night for the slain of the daughter of my people!" (Jeremiah 9:1).

Jeremiah knew a "pain unceasing, an incurable wound, refusing to be healed." The prophet himself lived a life full of indecent grief, a persistent heartbreak the men of Judah found obscene, excessive. They derided him as the "weeping prophet," God forbade him to marry, and he died a captive in Egypt. Yet he wrote not from base self-pity but because he understood the risk: If we fail to see the depths of pain inflicted by disaster, we will fail to bind up the wounds properly. At the same time, the pain is a powerful reminder of our limits. We must not fail to see like Jeremiah that ultimately the wound is incurable and the pain unceasing. In this life all binding and curing is temporary.

So beware the man with quick answers: Pat Robertson dismissing the calamity as part of "a pact to the devil"; Rush Limbaugh declaring that we gave already. Beware the man with wrong answers: Max Beauvoir, Haiti's high priest of voodoo, telling Haitians that the quake's unexpected deaths only disrupted the normally peaceful transition from one life to the next. "We believe that everyone lives 16 times—eight times we live as men, and eight times as women. And the purpose of life is to gather all kinds of experiences," said Beauvoir. Or the team of Scientologists, who went from makeshift shelter to makeshift shelter claiming to heal through touch. "When you get a sudden shock to a part of your body the energy gets stuck, so we reestablish communication within the body by touching people through their clothes, and asking people to feel the touch," said one volunteer.

Comfort that treats the bereaved as pets or as losers is no comfort. Comfort designed less to empower than to ease is short-lived. The old English defined comfort as "strengthening, encouraging, inciting, aiding" while the Americans refined it to "soothe in a time of distress" (see Oxford English vs. American Heritage dictionaries). Haitians, made in the image of God and like His Son sorrowful even to death, need strengthening comfort, the kind that fathoms both the depth of the loss and the length of the work ahead.

Haitians amid the rubble have a better sense of this. "Dye pi fo," some sang out from the shelters. "God is stronger."

Monday, February 01, 2010

Ken Sande on covenant membership

Ken Sande is the author of The Peacemaker and the founder of Peacemaker Ministries. Our elders have read this book and found it so helpful as we mediate conflicts and wage peace among God's people here at Grace.

(I posted earlier about The Peacemaker HERE.)

Here's an interview with Ken Sande from Leadership Journal on the value of covenant membership. It reiterates some of the things I stated in yesterday's message, where we looked at the biblical basis of covenant membership.


Taking Church Membership Seriously
Why it's time to raise the bar.
An interview with Ken Sande

Monday, April 18, 2005

Membership is not all that important at our church, about a third of respondents to a recent Leadership Weekly poll said. While 38 percent said attenders were frequently urged to join, and 34 percent said the membership appeal was occasionally given, the remainder said their church placed little or no emphasis on membership. That trend, according to many experts, is a mistake, the costly result of a casual, come-as-you-are attitude.

The church should be less like a cruise ship and more like a battleship, says Ken Sande of Peacemaker Ministries. Rather than emphasizing their casual atmosphere and fun activities, Sande says it's time for churches to raise the bar, to focus on a serious mission, and ensure that every person aboard serves a vital function. To make the shift, Sande says we must recapture the importance and meaning of church membership. If nothing else, emphasizing membership can protect the church from the growing threat of lawsuits.

Can you give an example of how deemphasizing membership can be perilous for a church?

I counseled a church where an attender used his relationships within the church to persuade people to invest over $2 million with him. The money was never returned to the investors. The church leadership struggled to respond because the man was not a member. If they said something publicly and warned the congregation about his actions, they risked a lawsuit for slander and defamation of character.

The church leaders finally asked the man to leave, but said nothing to the congregation. As a result he continued to scam people in the church for another year. When the victimized members discovered that church leaders knew about the man's actions but failed to publicly warn the congregation, they in turn threatened to sue the church for failing to protect them.

Several courts have ruled that churches may not discipline people who have not specifically consented to discipline. In this case, church leaders could not publicly warn the congregation about the man's actions without threat of a lawsuit because he was not a member, and had not consented to discipline. By not emphasizing membership, the leaders were prevented from fulfilling one of their most important biblical tasks—protecting the flock.

Why are more churches no longer emphasizing the importance of membership?

First, we've given in to our culture's antagonism toward commitment and accountability. Like parents who are afraid to discipline their teenagers, church leaders are afraid they will be unpopular for emphasizing commitment and accountability.

Secondly, there is a concern that if we create a barrier at the front door to the church, not as many people will enter, and the pressure leaders feel to grow the church is enormous today. But what we don't realize is that by not emphasizing membership we may have a wide-open front door, but we also have a wide-open back door. Numerical growth is really not helped by deemphasizing membership.

Many see membership in the church as similar to membership in other community organizations. How do we help people see it differently?

It requires very good teaching, and we need to use the terminology found in the Bible rather than our culture. The Bible speaks of the church as a family, or the household of God. If we emphasize this family language it will help people see that church membership is not like joining a country club, it is about joining an organic family.

The concept of the Body is also very helpful. The church is called the Body of Christ in the New Testament, and you don't just casually amputate a thumb. In fact, if the thumb is hurting the whole body goes to its aid. This metaphor shows the commitment, the accountability, and the interdependence of the church. Church leaders need to draw these concepts from scripture and clearly teach them.

How can leaders ensure that they have protected the church legally through a membership process?

You must achieve what lawyers call "informed consent." If you can show your people know what your church's disciplinary practices are, and that they have consented to them, that is a virtually ironclad defense against lawsuits.

You can achieve informed consent in a few ways. First, maintaining an attendance for the membership class so you can prove who has received the teaching. Second, a higher level of proof is to have new members stand before the church and actually verbalize membership vows and commitments. A third level, which gives you the best protection, is a signed membership covenant.

What should be included in a membership covenant?

The covenant itself can be kept fairly simple. A statement as basic as, "I have received a copy of the church's policies of redemptive discipline, and I consent to be bound by them" is sufficient. The church needs to have their disciplinary policies outlined somewhere and accessible to members, but the covenant only needs to refer to this other document to secure informed consent.

Apart from securing legal protection, what else is vital to include in a membership process?

At my church we have a twelve-week membership course, and our first priority is making sure a person has a credible profession of faith and understands the gospel. We also cover the theology of the church, our polity, our vision, how we handle conflicts, and an understanding of church discipline. Finally, it is helpful to discuss expectations for members regarding giving, respecting leadership, and serving in the community.

The membership process will be different in every church, but it is important to treat it as a significant event. When we treat it casually it sends the message that membership is casual. We highlight membership by having a special service, a membership Sunday. It is a serious ceremony that communicates the importance of membership.

What about retrofitting? How do churches with loose membership expectations, or none at all, begin to change and achieve informed consent?

Retrofitting requires a process that may take one to three years of educating the church to think more biblically about membership. I recommend preaching from Deuteronomy where there is a restatement of the Law.

Our church did this. We said to the congregation, "Times have changed from years ago when you could have a loose relationship with the church. Our society and our laws have changed. It's time for us to renew and tighten up the covenant."

Our people were very responsive to that because we took the time to educate them. We held a congregational meeting where revised bylaws and policies were presented, along with new procedures for accountability and conflict resolution. We met in small groups to talk personally, and over several months there was a lot of dialogue. That culminated in a church meeting where the new policies and bylaws were accepted. At that time we handed out a new membership covenant to be signed.

The last thing we did, to make sure we had informed consent, was send out a letter to everyone who did not sign the covenant. It said, even though we have not received a written covenant from you, we will interpret your continued attendance at our church, beyond a specified date, as your affirmation and consent to these policies. We didn't have a single family leave the church.

An attorney and engineer, Ken Sande is founder of Peacemaker ministries, a mediation and counseling service for churches and couples. www.hispeace.org

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Membership Covenants

Over the next two Sundays I'll be talking about the elders' commitment to move toward Covenant Membership here at GraceSLO. Understandably, after almost 80 years with no consistent membership track, many have questions. I hope to address some of those questions in these messages and then hit it again next fall when we formally and officially roll out covenant membership.

We are talking about a "Membership Covenant" as a part of our membership process. A membership covenant is simply a statement and pledge of our commitments to one another and to our Christian life together before the Lord.

What might be included in a membership covenant? I thought I'd post 4 sample membership covenants used by other churches we know and respect. Each is slightly different and reflects the unique life and character of that particular church, but all contain good stuff.

The first is from Capital Hill Baptist Church, currently pastored by Mark Dever . . .

Having, as we trust, been brought by Divine Grace to repent and believe in the Lord Jesus Christ and to give up ourselves to Him, and having been baptized upon our profession of faith, in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, we do now, relying on His gracious aid, solemnly and joyfully renew our covenant with each other.

We will work and pray for the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

We will walk together in brotherly love, as becomes the members of a Christian Church, exercise an affectionate care and watchfulness over each other and faithfully admonish and entreat one another as occasion may require.

We will not forsake the assembling of ourselves together, nor neglect to pray for ourselves and others.

We will endeavor to bring up such as may at any time be under our care, in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, and by a pure and loving example to seek the salvation of our family and friends.

We will rejoice at each other’s happiness and endeavor with tenderness and sympathy to bear each other’s burdens and sorrows.

We will seek, by Divine aid, to live carefully in the world, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, and remembering that, as we have been voluntarily buried by baptism and raised again from the symbolic grave, so there is on us a special obligation now to lead a new and holy life.

We will work together for the continuance of a faithful evangelical ministry in this church, as we sustain its worship, ordinances, discipline, and doctrines. We will contribute cheerfully and regularly to the support of the ministry, the expenses of the church, the relief of the poor, and the spread of the Gospel through all nations.

We will, when we move from this place, as soon as possible, unite with some other church where we can carry out the spirit of this covenant and the principles of God’s Word.

May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with us all. Amen.




The second is from Bethlehem Baptist Church, currently pastored by John Piper. . .

  1. Having been led, as we believe, by the Spirit of God, to receive Jesus Christ as the Lord, Savior, and, supreme Treasure of our lives, and, on the profession of our faith, having been baptized in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, we do now, in the presence of God, angels and this assembly, most solemnly and joyfully enter into covenant with one another as one body in Christ.

  2. We engage, therefore, by the aid of the Holy Spirit, to walk together in Christian love, to strive for the advancement of this church in knowledge, holiness and peace; to promote its spirituality and fruitfulness; to sustain its worship, ordinances, and discipline; to welcome, and test biblically, instruction from the Scriptures by the elders of the church which accords with the of Faith contribute cheerfully and regularly to the support of the ministry, the expenses of the church, the relief of the poor, and the spread of the gospel through all nations.

  3. We also engage to maintain family and personal devotions; to educate our children in the Christian faith; to seek the salvation of our kindred and acquaintances; to walk circumspectly in the world; to be just in our dealings, faithful in our engagements, and exemplary in our deportment, to avoid all tattling, backbiting and excessive anger; to seek God’s help in abstaining from all drugs, food, drink, and practices which bring unwarranted harm to the body or jeopardize our own or another’s faith.

  4. We further engage to watch over one another in brotherly love; to remember one another in prayer; to aid one another in sickness and distress; to cultivate Christian sympathy in feeling and Elder Affirmation, seeking to grow toward biblical unity in the truth; to courtesy in speech; to be slow to take offense, but always ready for reconciliation and mindful of the rules of our Savior to secure it without delay.

  5. We moreover engage that when we remove from this place, we will, if possible, unite with a likeminded church where we can carry out the spirit of this covenant.

  6. We acknowledge that implicit within this covenant is the consent to be governed by the Relational Commitments that have been officially adopted by the church and that address peacemaking and reconciliation, accountability and church discipline, marriage and divorce, counseling and confidentiality, and the protection of our children.
(The relational commitments are radical and challenging and worth looking at HERE.)


The third is from Covenant Life Church, formerly pastored by C.J. Mahaney and currently pastored by Joshua Harris. . . .

Our Commitments to One Another in the Sight of God

The basis for our joining together as members is our relationship with God the Father through the work of his son Jesus Christ communicated to us by the Holy Spirit.

As a member, I joyfully agree to walk together with the members of this church by making the following commitments:

• I will rejoice in the grace of God, privately and corporately giving thanks to our heavenly Father for the sacrifice of his son Jesus, for the forgiveness of our sins, and for the gift of the Holy Spirit who empowers us to believe and to live for the glory of God.

• I will live together with my brothers and sisters in love, just as God has loved us. I will seek their good through forming relationships that promote holiness, discipleship, worship, and sound doctrine.

• I will, as God enables me, care for my brothers and sisters in Christ in distress, sickness, and poverty.

• I will not neglect to meet together in corporate worship and in small group fellowship in those settings that the church provides.

• I will devote myself to the study of Scripture and to prayer both privately and through group contexts.

• I will seek to grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ through seeking progressive growth in holiness through the application of the means of grace as taught in Scripture.

• I will seek to advance the proclamation of the gospel through those relationships God has afforded me in my family, my workplace, and my community, and support those whom the church sends to proclaim the gospel beyond our locale.

• I will seek to serve the church’s ministries through regular giving of my time, effort, and money.

• I will pursue reconciliation when offense occurs between myself and another member, and I will reject all opportunities to speak or to hear gossip or slander.

• I will watch out for church members and admonish anyone whose practice of sin requires it. If one of our number requires corporate discipline, I will support the efforts and direction of the church, as led by its pastors, to call that member to repent of his sins. I agree with the church’s doctrine and practice of church discipline. I support the church’s teaching on reconciling disputes and agree to abide by the church’s “Statement on Conflict, Disputes, and Lawsuits” (see Appendix E, p. 86).

• I will promote marriage as a reflection of Christ’s relationship with his church and bring up any children God gives me in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. I support the church’s understanding of the Bible’s teaching on divorce and remarriage.

• I will, if I move from this place, unite with some other church where I can carry out the spirit of this agreement and the teaching of God’s Word.


The fourth is from Mars Hill Church, currently pastored by Mark Driscoll. . .

Introduction

“…Present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” -Romans 12: 1-2

As Christians, we are members of God’s household (Eph. 2:19) called to function, participate, and minister in a particular place within the body of Christ. A healthy body requires that each member do its part well. A healthy church requires the same: members who are sacrificially committed and well-equipped to do the works of service that God has prepared in advance for us to do (Eph. 2:10; 4:12). Mars Hill Church holds its members in high regard; we expect them to lead as missionaries of the gospel to the culture. God, in his sovereignty, placed us in this city, among these people, in this century, for a reason (Acts 17:26-27).

“For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned. For as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function, so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them…” -Romans 12: 3-8

Being a member of Mars Hill Church is really about being part of a family. All members are disciples of Jesus, unified by their identity in Christ. This unity is expressed in the way they collaborate in loving God, loving fellow Christians, and loving non-Christians. Members who enter into a covenant with their local church are called to a higher degree of responsibility and service. At the same time, the elders and deacons are covenanted to assist members first and foremost, to love and lead, provide counsel and aid, and pray for, teach, and guide them.

“Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. Show hospitality to one another without grumbling. As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace…” -1 Peter 4: 8-10

What is a covenant?

A covenant is a promise by which we obligate ourselves to one another in such a way that the obligation of one party is not dependent on the faithfulness of the other (Ezek. 20:44; 36:22; Ps. 76:11; Hos. 2:19-20; 3:1; 2 Tim. 2:13). The Mars Hill Church covenant includes a statement of faith, a statement of biblical doctrine, the obligations of Mars Hill Church to its members, and the obligations of members to Mars Hill Church. Though the covenant does define the relationship between members and the church, it is first and foremost a promise made to God as a commitment to his glory and his bride, the church (Eph. 5:25).

Statement of faith

Statement of biblical doctrine

  • I agree with the core beliefs of Mars Hill Church, which are founded upon historic creeds (e.g. Apostles’ Creed and Nicene Creed) and expressed in the doctrinal statement.

  • I understand the importance of submission to church leadership and will be diligent to preserve unity and peace; I will adhere to Mars Hill Church’s position on primary theological issues, and I will not be divisive over secondary issues (Eph. 4:1-3; Heb. 13:7, 17).

  • I agree that the sixty-six books of the Bible are the ultimate doctrinal authority on all matters (Is. 55:11; 1 Cor. 15:3-4; 2 Tim. 3:15-16; Heb. 4:12).

  • I understand that Mars Hill Church doctrine is also communicated and specified through various channels, such as sermons, published materials, and other writings distributed by Mars Hill Church.

Obligation of Mars Hill Church to its members

My obligation to Mars Hill Church as a member

  • I have read and understood the Mars Hill doctrinal statement and will not be divisive to its teaching. I also understand the importance of submission to church leadership and will be diligent to preserve unity and peace (Eph. 4:1-3; Heb. 13:7, 17).

  • I covenant to submit to the authority of Scripture as the final arbiter on all issues (Ps. 119; 2 Tim. 3:16-17).

  • I will maintain a close relationship with the Lord Jesus through regular Bible reading, prayer, fellowship, and practice of spiritual disciplines. My relationship will be evident through my participation in weekly worship services, communion, Mars Hill community, service, and a life that glorifies Jesus (Ps. 105:1-2; Ps. 119:97; Acts 2:42-47; Heb. 10:23-25; 2 Peter 1:3).

  • I will steward the resources God has given me, including my time, talents, and treasure (Prov. 3:9-10; Rom. 12:1-2; Gal. 5:22-26; Eph. 4:1-16; 5:15-18). This includes regular financial giving, service, and participation in community that is sacrificial, cheerful, and voluntary (Rom. 12:1-8; 2 Cor. 8-9; 12:7-31; 1 Peter 4:10-11).

  • I will not function in leadership or as a member in another church family (Heb. 13:17).

  • I covenant to submit to discipline by God through his Holy Spirit, to follow biblical procedures for church discipline in my relationships with brothers and sisters in Christ, to submit to righteous discipline when approached biblically by brothers and sisters in Christ, and to submit to discipline by church leadership if the need should ever arise (Ps. 141:5; Matt. 18:15-17; 1 Cor. 5:1-5; 2 Cor. 2:5-8; Gal. 6:1-5 8; 1 Tim. 5:20; 2 Tim. 2:25; Titus 1:9; 3:10-11; Heb. 12:5-11; Rev. 2:5-7, 14-25).

  • I agree, by God’s grace, to walk in holiness as an act of worship to Jesus Christ, who has saved me from my sin that I could live a new life (2 Cor. 5:17); I will practice complete chastity before marriage and complete fidelity in heterosexual marriage by abstaining from practices such as cohabitation, pornography, and fornication (Job 31:1; Prov. 5; Rom. 13:12-14; 1 Cor. 6:9-7:16; Heb. 13:4); I will refrain from illegal drug use, drunkenness, and other sinful behavior as the Bible, my pastors, and my conscience dictate (1 Cor. 8:7; Gal. 5:19-21). Should I sin in such a manner, I agree to confess my sins to Christian brothers or sisters and seek help to put my sin to death (Rom. 8:13; Col. 3:5; 1 John 1:6-10).

My commitment to the mission of Mars Hill Church

Mars Hill Mission Statement: Mars Hill Church lives for Jesus as a city within the city: knowing culture, loving people, and seeing lives transformed to live for Jesus.

I have read the mission statement of Mars Hill Church and commit to live out this mission as a diligent, faithful disciple of Jesus, that my identity would be in him, my worship would be for him, my fellowship would be through him, and my interaction with the culture would be for his glory.

I understand that this covenant obligates me to the members of Mars Hill and is an acknowledgement of my submission to the elders of the church. I accept the responsibility to notify Mars Hill leadership if at any time I can no longer commit to this covenant, or if I have any questions, comments, or concerns regarding Mars Hill Church.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Letter from Sandy & Stan

After preaching on encouragement on Sunday, I received this very discouraging letter in the mail on Monday. . . .

Dear Pastor,

My husband and I visited your church two weeks ago. We were disappointed.
Your focus was in reaching out and loving one another especially new people. No one even spoke to us let alone reached out and loved us.

The usher seated us next to a "doctor" like I was supposed to be impressed!!?? He took notes BUT never greeted us at any time. Some kind of love! This is very common in churches today. I experience this all the time. So, if people aren't going to love one another-then stop talking about it.


We now attend a 20% friendly church but no one goes beyond a handshake. You have 1,000 members so you may not need to grow, so stop talking about loving one another unless you demonstrate it.


On Christ the Solid Rock I stand all other ground is sinking sand.
Love, Sandy & Stan

Did these folks come in with a chip on their shoulder? Maybe.

Would their experience have been different if they would have come in assuming the best and actively engaging themselves? Probably.

But the fact remains, we didn't overcome their preconceived notions and chip. We didn't win them over. We let them get away without a warm GraceSLO welcome.

No address or other contact info, no last names, no way to reach out and try and connect.

Sad. I'm bummed.


Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Why Sermon-Based Growth Groups?

In last Sunday's message, I gave 5 reasons why we at GraceSLO are committed to a sermon-based model of Growth Groups. Here are those 5 reasons again in print so you can continue you thinking about them. . . .

  1. A sermon-based model is a SCALABLE MODEL.

    Remember we’re trying to move 1000 people toward covenant community. We’re trying to help 1000 people grow spiritually. How do we do that? We’ve got 20 groups. We need 50 groups. That means lots and lots of Growth Group shepherds who must be trained and equipped to lead. That’s a lot of work.

    A sermon based model allows us to ramp up Growth Group shepherds quickly because they aren’t responsible for creating their own content, which can be both time consuming and intimidating.

    We would be hard pressed to come up with 50 leaders who’d have the gifts and, especially the time to craft and prepare a weekly bible study for a growth group. I think we’d be hard pressed to find 25 leaders who could do that. But we make it easy and doable for Growth Group shepherds. We provide the content. . . we provide a weekly training audio that’s posted on the web.

    Scalability is vital when you talk about trying spiritually grow 1000 people and more. Growth Groups are Scalable Model.

    And yet. . . .

  2. A sermon-based model is a FLEXIBLE AND OPEN MODEL.

    All we ask is that shepherds use the text of the message as a spring board. If they want to go deeper or in a different direction, that’s fine with us and some leaders do. We see a sermon-based model, not as constraining or constricting or controlling, but rather as providing great freedom for our leaders.

  3. A sermon-based model ENCOURAGES DEEP PROCESSING AND APPLICATION OF GOD'S WORD.

    Most of us are on information overload. The last thing we need is more content. What we really need is to grapple with and apply the content we’ve already received. We need to go deeper, not broader. A sermon based model is a lecture lab model . . . . it’s a hear, discuss, do model.

    After all, God’s Word is relevant and profitable for our lives, according to 2 Timothy 3:16. If what we’re doing on Sunday morning is not relevant to our lives. . .. then I’m in trouble. What am I doing with the great majority of my time? It's my great aim to drive a balanced diet of God’s Word deep into your life.

    We don’t need more. We need deeper. Growth Groups are designed to take us deeper.

    Scalability, Flexibility, Depth.

  4. A sermon-based model KEEPS US UNIFIED AND GROWING IN THE SAME DIRECTION.

    We believe there is great value for us all to be grappling and applying the same truths throughout the week, instead of going in 20, 30, 40 different directions. We’ve seen how a sermon based model can unite the church. We think that’s powerful and desirable.

    And yet we’ve also talked about the need to address felt needs, things like marriage and parenting and other vital topics. . . . . so we’re open down the road to a few “tributary” groups that would shoot off the main stream of Growth Groups for a time. . . .

    These groups and their leaders will be individually approved on a case by case basis. . . . and would meet for a limited time after which the members would jump back into the main stream of Growth Groups.

    But again, our priority. . . our main stream will be sermon-based Growth Groups. Why? Because a sermon based model is scalable, it's flexible and open, it’s a model that encourages deep processing and application of spiritual truth, while keeping us united and growing in the same direction.

    And finally. . .

  5. A sermon based model is a MANAGEABLE MODEL.

    The church’s resources are limited and, quite frankly, in these economic times getting more limited. A sermon-based model seeks to make good use of the all the time and effort that is goes into the Sunday morning sermon.

    If everyone does whatever they want in their small groups, we have no idea where that might end up. Our leadership feels a responsibility to know and shepherd what happens in small groups that meet under the umbrella of our ministry. And yet we really don’t want to responsible for approving 20, 30, 50 different curriculums and policing the content of all our small groups.

    A sermon-based model takes the content selection challenge off the table. In other way to think about this. . . A sermon based model has built in quality control. We know what groups are talking about, because we’ve created the content.

    It's simply impossible to shepherd well a model where 20, 30, 50 groups are studying 20, 30, 50 different topics.

So for all these reasons, we’re committed to a sermon based model. We hope that gives you a bit more insight to our perspective and this important decision.

If you're interested in still more reasons for adopting a sermon-based model of small groups, check this out.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

I was distracted this morning. . .

I got this note last week from a friend, after I compared the menus of In-N-Out Burger and Carl's Jr. . . .

We have the scantily clad women Carl's Jr. has, too, sadly. I wonder if this is a subject the pastor wants to consider mentioning...here's an article about that sort of thing. I was distracted this morning and it irritated me.

The article he references is HERE. (Warning: the article pretty provocative and challenging, but honest and insightful. I think it captures well the real issues men face, but most women are unaware of.)

I thought it was awfully honest for this guy to reach out and share his "distraction." Admittedly, I am a bit busy and preoccupied on Sunday mornings, so this is not something that I've noticed.

But this is a subject "the pastor" is willing to mention. . . .

I think our sisters in Christ have an opportunity to serve and care for their brothers in Christ by dressing modestly when we come to worship the Lord together. I agree that the world gives us enough to deal with in this area. The church should offer men a refuge from the onslaught of overly sexualized culture.

I honestly don't think that Christian women are trying to arouse their brothers in Christ, but they really don't have a clue how the male mind works. Every honest Christian man I know admits struggle in this area. Every one.

Paul's comments about modesty in 1 Timothy 2, while originally intended to address flashy clothing, most certainly apply to scanty or over revealing clothing as well. . . .

Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly garments, but rather by means of good works, as is proper for women making a claim to godliness.--1 Timothy 2:9-10

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

FAQ #1: Growth Groups & Covenant Membership

In Sunday's message, we talked some more about "covenant community" and how we move toward it here at GraceSLO.

What is a "covenant"? In its broadest Biblical sense, a "covenant" is a committed and intimate relationship. Jesus makes possible a new "covenant" or committed intimate relationship with God by means of His shed blood. At the same time He calls us into a new "covenant community" called the church.

By "covenant community" I mean the kind of a committed, intimate, relational community which is implied in Acts 2:42, Romans 12:9-13 and numerous other passages which speak of the church's life together.

How do we move toward the kind of community God desires and the Bible describes for God's people in the church?

On Sunday, I highlighted two key commitments that our elders and pastors believe can move us forward in the days ahead. . . .

  1. A commitment to Growth Groups.


  2. A commitment to Covenant Membership.

Over the next couple of weeks, I'll say more about each of these, but for now, we've begun the dialogue.

If you haven't listened to the message, do that first.

If you have listened to the message, here's a first round of questions and my answers. That's important! These are my answers at present, and do not reflect the official position of the elders at this time. There is still much that needs to be discussed and decided. And yet, I still think it's helpful to open up the process and encourage the dialogue. On the membership front, very little is set in stone yet. The questions were great questions submitted by one individual in our church. Here goes. . .


  • Do you and the leadership anticipate keeping the growth group model currently being utilized? Are those groups going to continue being sermon based?

    We are committed to a "main stream" of Growth Groups that will be sermon-based, but we've also acknowledged the need for a few short term "tributaries" (working on a better term!) off the "mean stream". These "tributaries" will address felt need topics like parenting and marriage stuff. These groups and their leaders will be approved and the aim will be to get folks back into the "main stream" of the sermon based model as soon as possible. Our focus will continue to be sermon-based groups for a whole host of reasons including quality control, unity, growth in the same direction, leader equipping and training, manageability, maximizing the church's limited resources, and scalability.

  • Do you anticipate groups which will be gender specific, as well as gender specific groups being led by women or men?

    We're open to gender specific groups. We have had some in college for the last three years. But we also believe it's valuable and preferable, whenever possible, to get couples in groups together. Our experience is that couples just don't know how to talk about spiritual things very well and we believe a healthy, vibrant Growth Group can help couples grow in this area. Similarly, we believe couples together in Growth Groups is family-supporting, rather than segmenting the family throughout the week. We're trying to be careful to not undermine the family and its precious time together.

    We're open to Growth Groups organized around ages and stages of people's lives. (singles, married without kids, divorced, etc) We're fine with gender specific groups being led by leaders of the same gender. We're open to husbands and wives co-leading mixed-gender groups.
  • With the shift of focus at the church, who will be giving over site to this ministry?

    For now, Pastor Steve will continue to give over site to this ministry, though Ken, Steve, and I are working on a lot of this stuff together.
  • I know you just touched on membership and will be flushing that out more in the next few weeks, what will that look like for those wanting to serve at the church? Will membership be required to do so?

    We will tie serving to membership for most serving positions/places, but not all. I don't see membership being required for "entry level" and occasional serving positions like greeting, refreshments or Fall Kick-Off helpers, I'm open when it comes to POW Small Group leaders. Membership will be required for Growth Group Leaders and those who teach Sunday School. Our goal will to encourage all to move toward membership as a way of committing to our covenant community. The staff and elders have got a long way to go in terms of fleshing all this out, but these are my thoughts today. We see membership as a way of building a relational community, being accountable to one another, caring for one another, and shepherding the flock. Those who have a conscience issue with church membership we would work with individually. Those who don't want to become members, will be welcome here and not second class citizens, but limited in the places they can serve.

    We're really aware the church membership will an "uphill swim", in our culture which is increasingly individualistic and non-committal, but our moving forward is driven by a desire to better "be the church" and to better "shepherd the flock." We believe the Lord calls us to commit to one another, even in, or especially in, an age of non-commitment.
  • Are you anticipating a series of classes to instruct in this area?

    We do anticipate membership training classes. Pastor Ken has already begun teaching regular "Getting to Know Grace" classes, which we see morphing into Membership Classes. I expect for the great majority of the congregation, we will devise an initial way for them to become members.
  • Will growth group participation be a requirement of church membership?

    Again, we've got to flesh this out, but I imagine something like this being a part of a membership covenant. . . . .

    "Since the Christian life is not a solo or individual journey, I commit to regularly being involved with others here at GraceSLO in a Growth Group (our preference) or some other type of small group (men's, women's or other)."

    I would define regular as at least one quarter a year.


Again this is a "first blush", but hopefully it's helpful in opening up our evolving thinking on these matters.

I'm throwing it out there and we're inviting your input.